bythe_books | 085 - HE RETURNS. [Voice]

[His voice sounds a little far away, as he's not near his communication dealie]

Yes! [There's a triumphant laugh.] I'm back, I'm-- not... at the station? Thought they moved me to a... Hang on.

[There's the sound of some walking about, some rummaging as Sam moves about and inspects his room. He turns the TV on, and there's nothing but white noise.]

Come on... anything? Anything at all? [There's a loud smack as he hits the TV, then turns it off. Some more movement.]

What time is it-- Stars? Where's the gr-- ohhh no. No no no NO! [Something crashes, and there's frantic movement, the sound of a door opening, and hesitation. Footsteps grow louder as Sam walks towards the communication device. He picks it up and starts speaking into it. He sounds agitated and impatient.]

You screwed it up, yeah? Used the wrong drug? Pumped too much of that shit in? That it, eh? [Shouting:] Go on, then: what is it?! ANSWER ME! You stupid... bloody useless doctors! What happened to your noradrenaline, your perfect ten?!

[He's breathing quickly, panicked. You can't see it, but Sam's walking through the corridor now.]

Looks like a... hotel. Plush carpet. Wood panelling... on the walls... What is this?

[ANNND shouting again, desperately:] TALK TO ME! Somebody help me! [He slams a fist against the wall] Please...

[OOC: AND SAM'S BACK. Fully and completely reset. He's taken from Series 2, Episode 5, right when he's supposed to wake up from his coma within the coma. Instead, he finds himself on the Barge. NO, HIS MEMORIES AREN'T COMING BACK. And this means that Sam doesn't even believe 1973 is real, let alone the Barge.

...

and yes, I wanted to bring him back at the most horrible possible time c:]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Who's that?

Hello? You can hear me? [He laughs] It's Sam-- Sam Tyler! You're gonna-- this means... I'm coming home now, yeah?

Sam T-- Home? [What? Did you get lost on the way back or something?] DCI Tyler, this is the Barge.

My name is Captain Morgan Adams. Do you remember me?

The... Barge? What Barge, what is this?

Captain Morgan-- ah. Like the-- like the rum. [Dryly] Ha. Too funny, that. I must be out of my bloody mind.

[voice]

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[ACTION]

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[ACTION] - edit to reflect current events

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[ACTION] - Sometimes Morgan sounds like an 80s cartoon character.

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HELLO, SAM!

...hello?

HELLO!

You are to spank the salesman creature now, yes?

Spank the...

Who are you? Where is-- what is this place?

(no subject)

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Calm down, Sam. You're all right.

Annie? How are you-- how can you be here?

I've been here a few months now...Don't you remember?

That-- that's impossible. I was only out for a few hours, not... months.

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[Oh for gods sake, not again.]

Sam, I hope you realise that no one else does this?

[YES, AGAIN]

I am fully aware of that, and WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?

Edited 2010-02-09 14:58 (UTC)

[WHY SO MENTALLY FRAGILE SAM?]

Prefect.

Okay. "Prefect." Is your first name Ford, by any chance? It'd explain an awful bloody lot about this place.

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Sam? Do you not remember any of us?

Who's this?

I guess not.

Sergeant Howie. Not from your police force, from the West Highland Police. You're on the Barge, but I see that's been explained.

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Oy...

You're on a giant spaceship with vampires and supervillains and your job is to help put 'em through rehab until they're all sweetness and light.

Also, you keep getting killed a lot. Don't know why.

Welcome back to the shithole. You're clearly a masochist.

Oh. And my name's Rayne. I'm half-vampire and, yes, I know how that sounds...

[He just GROANS at that] God. I really have lost it this time.

I think we all have...

For fuck's sake. You're kidding me.

All right, then, who's this? Another vampire? An alien? A swashbuckling pirate? C'mon, what's my mind gonna throw at me this time?

Harvey Dent.

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